Taylor Madu | "How does she do it?"
Posted: Feb 13 2017
Have you ever met someone who instantly made you feel a certain way? Who inspired you without even knowing it? Well, let me introduce you to Taylor Madu. She is the absolute sweetest, and I am personally thankful that we crossed paths some time ago. With each weekly interview, I'm on a quest for both you and I to gain some new perspective. I hope that by reading the words from women and mothers all over the world, we are re-inspired to live a life that is JOYFUL, no matter the season we are currently in.
Tell us about yourself: Where do you live, age, marital status, number of kids and business.
My name is Taylor Madu. I am a 29 year old, married, and mommy to 2 little ones. My husband is Robert, my mini me is Everly Adair, we call her “Evie”, and my little Bubba boy, is Robert Nnaji Madu III, and we call him Nnaj or Bubba. My husband is a full-time evangelist, a pastor who travels globally. I sometimes go out as well and speak. Our hearts and our mission is loving people back to Jesus. My family is my world. I live and breathe to hold it down at home, so that my husband can do what he is called to do; and that my children have everything they need, from physical to emotional, day to day necessities. I was a hair stylist for 6 years. Once the babies came, I felt called to be a full-time Stay At Home Mommy. Therefore, that’s exactly what my life has consisted of the passed 2 years, from when my first child came into this world.
Describe a day in the life of you.
Honestly, to the average person, it may seem pretty lame or boring. Lol! But for me, in the midst of the repetitiveness, I am more fulfilled than I have ever been. I wake up to Nnaj pulling on my hair and cooing with the biggest smile on his face, roughly around 6:30 am-ish. Not to fail to mention, he sleeps with me, therefore, I am up throughout the night with him, feeding or soothing. From there, I hear Evie over the monitor, telling her babies “no no”.. and I listen while she carries on many conversations with her stuffed animals. First things first, I change both of their diapers…bring them into the living room/kitchen area..turn on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and then make their breakfast. I make a latte from my Nespresso machine, because this is what will help me survive the day! We talk, laugh, and play a little, yet, in between things I have to do for them, I try to find time to do a little bit of blogging, reading, or business responsibilities. These moments are constantly interrupted with “uh oh Mommy”… or “No evie, don’t hurt your bubba"… changing a poopy diaper (s)… the list goes on. Around 11 am the babies will take a nap. They just started taking a nap roughly around the same time. This gives me an hour by myself. This hour is critical because it’s the only hour I get to myself before they wake up! Do I take a long hot bath? Do I answer emails and blog? Do I do the laundry and clean the house? Do I watch tv or just sit in the amazing silence? So many questions—and what do I do? This varies depending on what desperately needs to be done on that particular day! Babies wake up, we play, we have lunch…eventually have dinner… bath time… play a bit longer…then 9:00 pm rolls around and Evie is usually ready for bed. Nnaj’s bedtime varies depending on the day. I have a hard time letting him “cry it out”… I've never been good at that.. So, I’ll admit.. he runs me. LOL! And Evie did the same thing, you live and learn right? By the time Nnaj finally goes down for bed, I am completely done. I would love to do something for myself by this time, but the best thing I can do is sleep while I can because Nnaj will be waking up soon to feed again. The night continues and I am up with Nnaj a few times a night… then so very quickly 6:30am-ish sneaks up on me, and the day starts all over again!!
Do you have help? A nanny or housekeeper? Family?
I actually do not have a nanny. I am very weird with who I allow to watch my children. It took me forever just to leave them with family so that I could go get my nails done or go to the grocery store. Time, and the grace of Jesus, has helped me and grown me in this area. Now, family will watch them for date night or something, but overall, it's me and them 24/7. I have a housekeeper come in once a month or once every 2 months to do a deep clean. I will maintain the house until their next visit.
How do you manage to have “me” time?
It is very hard for me to have “me” time. Once again, like I mentioned, I have come a very long way… but I still find it challenging. For so long, I felt selfish to leave them and get my nails done, or to go have a date, because I felt I was doing something for myself and they “need” me… but then I quickly learned that time away is healthy. I am still growing in this area.
How do you manage to make time to stay in shape? Do you workout? Diet?
No I don’t. Once I was released from the doctor to workout after my c section with Nnaj, I gave myself a Mommy gift, and bought training sessions for 1 month. I needed a little jump start to help get the weight off. After the month, my back went out for about a week, and I never picked back up unfortunately!
Do you get ready every day? Makeup, hair and curated outfits? If so, how do you do it with children?
Yes and No. Usually I stay in workout clothes or in my cozy, hideous robe. Lol! But, I also love fashion and I love blogging outfits, so I will sometimes put on an outfit so I can blog about it! It usually takes me 2- 3 hours to get ready with the babies. Truly, it's INSANE. It blows me away every day, as if it's something new! Lol! But it's reality! Constant interruptions cause for a 3 hours of getting ready!
Has your style changed after motherhood?
I don’t think so. Style changes with trends, however, overall, I feel I am the same. Although, life has changed in many other ways after motherhood!
If you breastfeed, how do you schedule your day around feedings and outings?
I've always fed on demand. With that being said, my babies live on the boob. Evie fed for 10 months and never took a bottle or solids… if that tells you anything! She LIVED ON THE BOOB, day and night. Nnaj is an amazing eater, so he will feed here and there. I have an incredible nursing shawl that looks like it’s part of my outfit, so most of the time when I am feeding in public, no one even knows!
How many hours of sleep do you get a night, on average?
What is a priority for you, and what gets sacrificed? For example, everyone looks great but the house is a disaster, or the house is clean but work deadlines get pushed back.
This varies depending on the day. I am OCD so if my house is out of order, I feel like my life is falling apart. With babies, it has helped me to chill out. But it still stings when I know there is laundry to be done, dishes in the sink, and beds unmade! I can't deal! I try to do it all, but each day has the main priority, and everything else comes after.
Do you cook meals every day for your family? If so, how do you plan them?
I will cook here and there. Depends on how long we are home for. Sometimes we travel with Daddy, so groceries will ruin. So it does vary. But I am the old school, southern wife, that loves to cook a meal for the family, and us all gather around the dinner table together.
Have you ever felt like you are losing yourself to motherhood and or life? If so, how did you bounce back?
Oh yes! 100%. I’ve felt that I was losing myself to motherhood and also losing my mind. With no sleep and being pulled in a million different directions, I have had a few meltdowns. Tears and tears. I don’t like to ask for help… but there have been a few times where my body just shut down and said you cannot go another day like this. Especially having 2 babies under 2. I was pregnant for 2 years in a row, with a traveling husband, and other responsibilities, in the midst of sleep depravation… I had to realize, I am human..and its' okay to crumble at moments, but you have to take time for yourself.
Does hubby help you with anything in particular? If so, what and how?
Yes, he is always helpful when he’s home.. as much as a man knows how to be – (BIG LOL) And all the women say! No, I’m being funny… Robert and I are a team. He is my best friend and I am constantly reminded why God called us to be together. I do majority of the work, but he is willing to help, if I ask.
How do you manage motherhood and marriage?
This has definitely been a challenge, more for me than Robert. Like I mentioned, I have had the hardest time leaving my babies. I’ve needed a break away, but felt guilty. Therefore, after they pull every ounce of energy from me, by the end of the day, I just want to sleep. But I believe praying and allowing the Holy Spirit to lead me, is what is going to help me steward and balance motherhood and marriage.
Do you work? Do you work in an office or at home? What does your work consist of and how do you get it done during the week?
I have certain responsibilities here and there. I will work from home at my computer, blogging, answering e-mails, etc. It takes me multiple hours a day.. and of course, takes me a lot longer when the babies are pulling on me left and right.
Has your circle of friends changed now that you're a mother? If so, how do you meet new mommy friends?
Yes, my circle of friends has changed. It has changed with age, and just having a family that consumes my life. I am more closed off than I have ever been. I used to be the life of the party and wanted to be around every single person… but with children and marriage, I am a big family girl. I love my family and hold them so close to my heart. I have mommy friends here and there… church and social media mommys that I find inspiration from…but overall I am a family ride or die type of girl.
What’s the least favorite household chore you dread doing?
Vacuuming for sure!
Describe a recent experience when you didn’t have it “all together” and how you handled it all.
In the middle of the night, I was by myself with the babies, exhausted. Evie and Nnaj were tag teaming against me. Evie woke up screaming, not feeling well. Had thrown up in her crib, snot every where… come to find out it was hand foot and mouth. I had to change the sheets, give her a bath, and take care of her… finally got her down. Then Nnaj wakes up screaming… same exact thing… and the night continued this way. I felt like I was losing my mind. I yelled at God a few times.. “FIX THIS!! HELP ME!! IM SO TIRED…” Once again. Sleep depravation is NO JOKE. But what I constantly tell myself is “I am called to this. I was created for this. Breathe in, breathe out… How many women would give anything to have a crying screaming baby… yet there are so many that aren’t able to conceive. God knew this day, this moment, he has graced me… everything is going to be okay…” And it eventually is okay. One big thing in motherhood is, EVERYTHING IS A SEASON. You have to approach every single situation with that mindset. This wont last forever… and it doesn’t. I've watched Evie and Nnaj both change with each season. Moments that I thought would forever be, are now just a memory.
Fill in the blank: As a mother, it's a luxury to..
get in the car without having to load or unload a baby in a carseat!!!
What is your philosophy on balance and does it exist in your home?
I believe everyone's “balance” looks different. However, the very thing I turn to on a daily basis, is seeking Jesus, to know what balance looks like for our family. When I try to figure it all out on my own, that’s when things get messy and out of order. But when I simply say, Jesus, I give you this day, and every detail that lies within it. I trust that you will lead me… He truly does. He is my road map for this thing called “life…wife…motherhood”
What are your dreams outside of motherhood that you would like to accomplish?
I want to continue to pursue lifestyle blogging, blogging my heart, my fashion details, home décor, etc… maybe write a book one day… eventually release a worship album… Those are dreams that are great.. and may or may not happen. But honestly, if they don’t, I am okay with that because I feel like I am living THE DREAM right now. I have never been so happy… my marriage, my babies, the opportunity to travel the world and tell people about Jesus… Life doesn’t get any better than this!